Stupidity is Always for Sale

I think I'm obsessed with shoes. Seriously, my love of shoes is unnatural. I wish I had money so I could buy whatever I wanted. Meghann's birthday is coming up so as soon as I get money it's going to be gone again on her present. It's not easy being poor. Well I'm not generally poor I just don't have a lot of money. I would ask Grandma for some because I need new clothes, but I don't know. She's already paying for me to go to school and get new uniforms, and if Mommy can't get me lunch money I'm going to ask her for some too.
My muscles are so sore from volleyball. I'm starting to show improvement. I'm as good as any other person who has played for at least two years and I've only really played for one. I still can't overhand serve which is really making me angry. I would really kill to overhand serve like some of the other girls.
I'm just a naturally jealous person. I should like what I have more, but I really don't. I wish school would hurry up and start again because I'm getting so bored of summer, I'm ready for school to start so I can actually have something to do!
Liam is leaving...for forever. Not really, he's just going to visit his family for a long time. I probably won't really see him until school starts again. WHICH IS A MONTH AND A HALF AWAY!!! That's way to long for me to not see him. I'm going to go crazy. I'm crazy just thinking about it. I miss him just thinking about it.
He makes waking up in the morning worth while. Just so I can talk to him, or occasionally even see him. I don't see him a lot. It was harder at the beginning of the summer because I was transitioning from seeing him almost every day to seeing him once every two weeks. BIG CHANGE! I've adjusted to that I can adjust to not seeing him til school starts. I saw him today :)
I gave him a hug. I like hugging him around the waste because that way I don't have to stand on my tippy toes and I can lay my head on his chest. I like laying my head on his chest :) I also saw him Monday. I had fun. I was about to cry when he told me he was going to visit his family and I wouldn't see him for a while. Go ahead you can think I'm stupid but you have no idea what it's like to go a while without seeing the one you love, the one that keeps you sane, keeps your dreams happy, the one who blows your mind and keeps you wondering every other second. It's like you can't think straight and your unhappy no matter what anyone does because that one person isn't there. Now you can say I'm exaggerating and you can think whatever you want but honestly, life without Liam is almost pointless. As much as I don't want my world to revolve around him, it generally does. Now I'm not saying that if Liam died in some freak accident I would kill myself. I would be upset and lost and confused and probably would need psychiatric help for the rest of my life but I have my sisters and brother and my friends that need me. Especially my younger sisters, they're going to need me there to guide and help them and I couldn't give all that up for just one person, no matter how important to me he is because I know that if Liam died he would want me to live my life and be happy and helpful and be the best person I can be and not mope around OR kill myself.
I must say I at this moment I love no one more than Liam and Bitty. It's crazy. I'm genuinely happy. Thank you God, Bitty, and Liam.
So to wrap it up, fall in love, it's the best thing that will ever happen to you. Keep that love close and remember if you do lose it, there's more than one kind of love so don't give up just because you've lost one because another will come along eventually. It's all a part of the plan!